This week, we had the privilege of baptizing four people, all of whom are children of believers. This coming week, we will be doing our parent covenant ceremony, in which parents (and the church) commit to raising children in the fear and admonition of the Lord. In a sense, we scheduled these backwards, as the celebration of baptism (in this case) is the fulfillment of the promises that God makes to the children of believers. It raises for us a question: what is the purpose of children?
When I took over as children’s pastor at my previous church, the first thing I did was write a THEOLOGY OF CHILDREN, which briefly summarized the Bible’s description of children. This was mainly to help guide and direct us in what we were doing; how we understand children is going to affect how we teach them, discipline them, and care for them. In this, we are looking at children through our responsibility to them. Here, I want to do something a little but different. I want to think through why God would create human beings to be born as babies, mature through adolescence, and stumble into adulthood. This is not just how things are, God created this process for a reason. There is a purpose of childhood. As we read through the Bible, we see children used to help us understand God, ourselves, and the relationship between the two.
Children give us a definition of immaturity | so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. | Ephesians 4:14
One of the ways that the Bible uses children is as a description of what it means to be foolish. Children are foolish because they lack the wisdom that comes from experience. As you grow and mature, you become less of a child (1 Corinthians 13:11). There are things this life teaches us that are good, helpful, and necessary. When we apply this to our Father in heaven, it put our wisdom in its place. No matter how wise we get, we are still children in relation to God; there is so much that we do not know.
Children remind us of our dependence | For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the basic principles of the oracles of God. You need milk, not solid food. | Hebrews 5:12
The Bible talks about children as reliant on their parents (especially their moms). This is a reality for anyone who has had a child: the first year or two is just keeping them alive. Once again, this tells us something of our relationship to God. We are never able to handle it on our own, we are always dependant on God to carry us through. Kids think they are more able than they actually are, believing themselves to be independent while they still rely on mom and dad for most of their needs (this is called the teenage years). Similarly, we live as if we are self-sufficient, while God holds all things in our life together. We act like selfish adolescents when we do not give God credit for His care.
Children help us engage with our sinful rebellion | It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? [8] If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. | Hebrews 12:7–8
It is not difficult for us to see the sin of children, because it comes in the form of hitting and temper tantrums; they wear their emotions on their sleeves. We are much better at hiding it. Their sinful displays are a reflection of our hearts. In the same way we discipline our kids so that they learn, the Bible tells us, God disciplines His children. This helps us to see the struggles of this life as more than just a test or our good fight against all the bad things out there; our struggles are Father lovingly helping us to see what we need over what we want.
Children teach us about innocence and trust | but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” | Matthew 19:14
As we grow and mature, we also get cynical and hardened. Sometimes it is difficult to see the difference between sinful corruption and wisdom, but kids act as a mirror for this. There have been numerous times when my kids are shocked by something I don’t even notice, and I have to ask myself: why doesn’t that offend me anymore. Children have a much more black/white view of the world, because they can’t think of a world without obvious good/bad. While there is wisdom and discernment needed here (see point 1), there is also a beautiful trust and assurance that we lose over time. Jesus says: it is this simple yet profound trust (and hatred of evil) that marks His children.
Children bring joy | when a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world. | John 16:21
Kids are able to bring lightness into a heavy world. They don’t have the same concerns and worries and it allows them to more fully experience joy. Their joy is contagious. It is impossible to watch a toddler in full belly-laugh and not join them. We need to be reminded that at the core of our existence is joy, lest we lose our joy in the anguish. In the verse above it references the phenomenon of women forgetting the pain of childbirth because of the joy their child brings into the world, which is a very real thing. The joy that we have been promised and will receive has the same cleansing effect; kids are part of telling us this story.
Children focus our efforts | And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. | Deuteronomy 6:6–9
God tells the Israelites that they should love and obey His commandments, but He directs them in relation to their children: teach them! This is because it is in our responsibility to children that we feel the most vulnerable and in need of help. It is in this task that we take seriously what we should have cared about before. I have known numerous people who re-engaged with Jesus and the church only after having children and realizing that they did not have the tools necessary to train them. Children give us the motivation to make changes and pursue things that we should have been already. They put our lives into perspective. They help us to appreciate a Father who is willing to do whatever is necessary in order to best care for His kids.
Through foolishness, sinfulness, innocence, joy, and dependence, God uses children to shape us into the people He has created us to be. Kids are not just ‘potential adults,’ they are a very important part of how God has designed us to know Him. We were once the children God was using to shape our parents and grandparents. All of this should help us to see God’s creative order in guiding generation after generation.