May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus, that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. | Romans 15:5–6
This Sunday, Andrew preached from Daniel 5: the story of the finger writing on the wall during the king’s party. One of the points that Andrew made was about Daniel’s patience and consistency. He served for over 20 years in the king’s court (through various kings), and was basically forgotten until called upon to make sense of the message on the wall. What we see is someone who was committed to the task for decades, based on his character, not the situation or even person he was committed to. It reminded me of the great benefits that come from staying the course, even when others chose to ignore their commitments or jump ship for a seemingly better opportunity.
Part of the reason that my mind went there was because of what the rest of my weekend included. First was the 3strand annual summit. This is a time for the elders from all of our 3strand churches to get together to fellowship, reflect, and look forward to the coming year. This is a group of churches that have covenanted together: committing to one another for the sake of church health. We practice rhythms that build our relationship with one another, so that it is strong when we need to lean into it. We promise to be there for one another when there is a need and to partner together to help accomplish the Great Commission in Western Washington. Truth is, the last few years have been rough for our network, but this weekend we were able to see the grace of God that was exposed through it. While we don’t know exactly what the future holds, we are more committed to the long-term benefits of covenant than we were before the challenges.
I went from there to officiate a wedding. My wedding talks focus more of the difficult times than it does on the good, because I have never known anyone who needs their vows to hold them to the marriage when everything is going great. In the wedding ceremony, we hear two people commit themselves to love and care for the other in good times and BAD, health and SICKNESS, and in times of rich and POOR. When a person makes these vows, it is not conditioned on how well the other person fulfills theirs; it is a promise to continue to do what is right in spite of all of the circumstances. It is a beautiful thing when people choose to honor their vows over what seems to be easiest or most self-serving. It is these times when we reveal if our motivations come from God or from a human sense of good.
On Sunday, I had the privilege to gather with our church and see the many people who have been loved, cared for, and brought into the family of God through the long-term faithfulness of the church body. I tell people all of the time that there are people in our church who do so many things for others that I am not even sure how they fit it all into their schedules. The fruit of this is evident all over our church; every Sunday we have an opportunity to come together and put it on display. The church is a picture of God’s grace through the faithfulness of His people.
I then got to sit with a few guys I have been friends with for over a decade to talk about all of the ups and downs that life brings and how God has been faithful through all of it. We got to encourage one another, challenge one another, and laugh. It was a great reminder of the kind of trust and love that you can only have when you have walked alongside someone for a long time.
This kind of commitment, where you decide to keep being there, in spite of the changes that life brings, is rare these days. We have been taught that to get the most out of life, you have to be quick to drop what doesn’t work and that relational drama is a hindrance to finding meaning and purpose. I have found the exact opposite to be true. In order to truly find yourself, you have to first give yourself up. It is only after you have chosen to care more about the commitment you have made to others than about what you get out of those you interact with, that you reap the benefits of relationship. It is a reflection of the love we have been shown by God, who calls us His based on Himself and continues to be faithful to His people in spite of their continual failings. This is not just the ‘right thing to do,’ it is also woven into the fabric of how this world works. We know ourselves through our relationships. God has created these to give us the love, safety, and belonging that we are all so desperately looking for. You can only find this when you stop trying to create it on your own and open yourself up to God’s plan and the levels of community He has placed you in.
We need to learn to be patient and committed in all things, but especially in our relationships. We need to learn that faithfulness has long term benefits that we cannot see. We need to trust that God’s way is better than ours. If we can, the fruit it produces is sweet indeed.