Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed. | Hebrews 12:12-13
On Sunday, I preached on the issue of character. I made the claim that the development of our character – God conforming us to the image of the Son (Romans 8:29) – is the goal for our lives. Rather than worrying about the outcomes, we should focus on how the ups and downs of life sanctify us and bring us closer to God.
To get there, we have to let go of control. I used the analogy of a whirlpool. Unlike a leisurely swim across a calm lake, where you can turn back whenever you want, to enter into a whirlpool is to allow it to control you. No longer are you calling the shots, but you are being controlled by forces outside of yourself. This is only good if this outside force is working for your best. With God, we can trust Him to discipline us in a loving and good way. Hebrews 12, lays this out for us, saying:
“My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord,
nor be weary when reproved by him.
For the Lord disciplines the one he loves,
and chastises every son whom he receives.”
It is for discipline that you have to endure. | Hebrews 12:5–7
The idea here is that God uses difficult things to discipline us for our good. We should think of this discipline, not mainly as a punishment, but as a means to growing and maturing. Our response to this discipline is at the top of this blog:
lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet
We should keep moving forward, following God’s wisdom, trusting that He will use our obedience to do a work in us. After the service, I had a number of people who have gone through this, talk to me. While their stories were different, there were a few common parts to all of their experiences.
- The character built could not have been done any other way
One of the concepts I kept hearing was: I don’t know if there was any other way that I could have personalized and understood this truth. Pain and suffering are not just things to be avoided, they are also some of the best teachers. There are a number of doctrines and ideas that we ‘know,’ but that we haven’t really embodied. To go from an idea to part of a character often takes a refining that we would never choose.
- The lesson learned was not the one expected
We all have an idea of what we know and where we still need to grow. Often, we are wrong about this. In many of the stories I heard, the reality that God revealed was not what was expected. It is sometimes the place where we think we are strongest that we need to grow. This is why we must give up control.
As long as we hold the reins, we will only learn the things we think we should; we will limit how we are stretched. God knows what we need. He knows exactly how to help us get it. When we lean into Him, we are giving Him the authority to do what needs to be done (an authority He already has, but one that does not benefit us if we aren’t united to Him).
- All of the suffering was worth it for what they now have
Each person told me that they would never choose their specific battle. If asked, they would not have been willing to go through the difficulty. On the other side of it, they would not go back. What they have gained in relationship with God and trust in Him is worth far more than any momentary challenge. This has always been one of the greatest witnesses to me. When you talk with people who have suffered greatly, you find that God gets bigger and more present. This reshapes the whole world. Those who have faced hardships often have a deeper joy than those who have not (and they are unwilling to imagine a life without it).
One of the greatest voices of this is Joni Eareckson Tada, a woman who was paralyzed at 17 and has lived the majority of her life as a quadriplegic. She has done an amazing job describing the intimacy of God in suffering and the way that He has worked through it in her life. She points to His larger purposes as the reason she finds hope in it, saying:
God is more concerned with conforming me to the likeness of His Son than leaving me in my comfort zones. God is more interested in inward qualities than outward circumstances – things like refining my faith, humbling my heart, cleaning up my thought life and strengthening my character.
Strive for character and you will find it, because God is disciplining you toward it. It requires leaving your comfort zone, but will benefit you far more than you can imagine.