My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory. For if a man wearing a gold ring and fine clothing comes into your assembly, and a poor man in shabby clothing also comes in, and if you pay attention to the one who wears the fine clothing and say, “You sit here in a good place,” while you say to the poor man, “You stand over there,” or, “Sit down at my feet,” have you not then made distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts? | James 2:1-4
Some comments I have been asked about our church:
- Is flannel the official uniform here?
- Has anyone here ever owned a razor?
- Is this a lumberjack convention?
After service this Sunday, I had two different people ask my wife why the look (didn’t help that the guys who did announcements, led worship, read the law, and preached all had the beard/flannel thing going)? In the past I have given a handful of different responses: its a demographic issue, its a current trend issue, its a northwest thing, its not as pervasive as you are making it out to be, or I just don’t know. The more I face this question, the more I realize it has very little to do with what the people at my church wear or grow on their face, and a lot more to do with our idea of church.
I know this because I have had similar questions about why there aren’t more older people in the church, why there aren’t more younger people, why so many home-schoolers, or why we do certain kinds of songs. The questions all come down to style and demographic. Why does your church have the people that it does and why do they do things the way they do?
The false assumption is that the people who are at the church are there out of some grand plan to attract a certain kind of person; or that the style of the church was created out of a desire to look like something. The reality is much less organized (and less ominous). The reason why our church has so many beards and flannel is because these are the people who came to our church.
Some of this has to do with me. I am of a specific age, I have a beard, I wear flannel, and my wife and I home-school our kids. Some of the people who have come to our church because they ‘connect with’ aspects of the church that go beyond the stated liturgy. They are also invited by people who are already friends, further establishing a style. A lot of people come to our church and don’t stay because they feel like the only smooth face or the only older person. There is nothing we can do about that.
That isn’t entirely true. We could require everyone to shave so that the un-bearded feel more invited. We can ban flannel from Sunday service. Or we could coordinate what people wear so that we always have an equal number of all styles…but we won’t. We won’t do any of these things because they are not what it means to be the church. To be the church means to love people as family no matter they look like; we will worry about the people that God brings to our church, not the ones He does not. We will love the bearded and unbearded alike; the flannel and polos; the big families and the small; the married and the single; the adopted kids and the biological ones; people from all nations and nationalities.
Not showing partiality means not catering to people based on their style or age or nationality. It goes both ways. It means not looking down on those who are ‘different,’ but also not making a big deal about those you see as ‘the same.’ Within the church, this means not allowing style to dictate your fit. As part of the family, you have a part in determining the culture; you belong because Jesus has invited you in, not because of some external measurement. If people saw the church like this, the style of the church would constantly change based on the people God calls to this family.
This is my prayer for our church. We will always have a style, but I pray we are never so entrenched in a style that we are unwilling to change, or to love well those who are different than us. Our job is to simply be ourselves, love God, and love others. Beards optional.